6 Amazing Tips to Figure Out What Diamond Ring She Wants

By Michael Fried

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Gathering information about what type of ring she wants (i.e. the setting, style, a diamond vs. a gemstone) will help immensely in your search for an engagement ring. Follow our expert tips in the guide below to visualize the ring of her dreams. Once you have a vision, look at jewelry from top vendors like James Allen, Blue Nile and Brian Gavin Diamonds. These vendors are the most reputable and reliable, and offer the best value and beauty for your budget. 

Whether you’re planning an intimate engagement or one on the jumbo screen at a baseball game, it’s important to have a pulse on what type of ring she actually wants—especially if it’s going to be a surprise. Luckily, there are a few ways to decipher her ring style and expectations.

After this reading this article, you’ll have methods to determine:

With these tips in mind, you’ll be able to purchase a ring that meets or surpasses her vision. Ultimately, the ring you choose is a symbol of your love and commitment. Taking the time to learn about her style and diamond rings in general will give you a head start on a beautiful life together.

Tip #1: Pay Close Attention to Her Style

Like a detective, you can pick up details about your fiancé-to-be by keeping a close eye on her wardrobe, jewelry and other accessories. Don’t be afraid to keep notes and ideas in an organized place like a notebook or spreadsheet.

While fashion evaluation isn’t a science, watch for these common patterns:

  • She opts for simple fashion (i.e. jeans, leggings, solid-colored shirts). Her ring style is likely clean, minimal and without lots of ornamentation, like an Oval Solitaire Engagement ring.
  • She’s always dressed in the latest fashion and stays up-to-date with current trends. Consider the most popular rings along with the rings celebrities are wearing.
  • She gravitates toward vintage dresses and antique furniture. Check out vintage styles like this stunning Floral Halo Engagement ring.
  • She’s hands-on with her job or hobbies (i.e. sports, gardening, rock climbing). Choose a style with a low-set diamond vs. a cathedral or high-prong diamond. There will be less chance it will snag or be damaged.
  • She’s sentimental about items she received from grandma and other relatives. See if there’s a family heirloom that can be re-purposed for her engagement ring.

Tip #2: Utilize the Internet

Many women (and men) have stored loads of information online—readily available for anyone to see. Pinterest accounts are a great place to start investigating, where she’s potentially saved engagement ring examples.

If you can’t find rings specifically, check out her other posts and images to see if they offer you clues about her style. Simply enter her name or username into the Pinterest search engine and you’ll have access to her dreams and visions.

Tip #3: Involve the Women Closest to Her

Lean on the ladies who are closest to your fiancé-to-be: her mom, sister, best friend, cousin, whoever. Chances are your significant other has shared with them her desires or preferences for a ring. If they don’t know, you can have them bring up the conversation in a casual manner, such as, “Do you think he’s going to propose soon?” or “If he were to propose, what would you want?” Slowly easing into the conversation will make her less suspicious that you’ve put her up to the task.

You can even ask her mom or one of her friends to shop with you. Women are often skilled at narrowing down styles, especially if they know the person well. But be sure to be discrete in your meetings. She shouldn’t be clued in to the fact that you’re spending one-on-one time with your future mother-in-law.

Tip #4: Analyze Her Other Jewelry

You can discern quite a few clues from the jewelry in her current collection. Does she wear silver-colored necklaces? Does she have rings and bracelets in yellow gold? Do her pieces tend to be classic with diamonds and pearls or ones with colored gemstones? You can even pretend you’re thinking of buying her a bracelet or a set of earrings, and see if you can glean information about the type of metal or settings she prefers.

You can also find out clues from jewelry other women have received. For example, if a recent Facebook friend got engaged, bring it up nonchalantly in conversation. Try to include a question regarding if she liked the ring. You’ll get some key information about the proposal she might envision, and type of ring she likes or doesn’t like.

Tip #5: Consider “Just Browsing”

If you two happen to be in a mall or pass by a jewelry store, stop in and tell her you’re just browsing. This will of course clue her in to the fact that you might propose, but if you’re casual enough, she might not get too suspicious. You can gain valuable information just by noticing what rings she gravitates toward.

We always recommend buying the ring alone, and better yet, online. When it comes to closely analyzing a ring and determining your budget, you want to do this in private. Buying the ring in secret also lets the proposal be more of a surprise, even if she does have a clue that you’re thinking about popping the question.

Tip #6: Ask her!

If you’ve tried the methods above, and you feel that a surprise engagement ring is not your style (or hers), then feel free to ask her directly about what she’s hoping for. From the type of gemstone (diamond or otherwise) to the setting color to the overall style, you’ll have all of the specs to go on.

From there, the ring design and selection can be your own, if you want. She’ll be wearing the ring for the rest of her life, so follow her leads. Overall, do what’s comfortable for you and what you think she’ll most appreciate.

If you do ask her for details on what she wants, you’ll need to defer to those preferences. Even if it’s not your style or preference, you should stick with what she has told you. Although you’re paying for the ring, she’s the one that it’s ultimately for.

Figuring Out Her Ring Size

Now that you have the insider tips for determining the type of ring she wants, be sure you choose the right size. Read our article here about how to determine her perfect ring size.

Additional Engagement Ring Resources

For more information on purchasing a stunning engagement ring at an excellent price, check out our other Diamond Pro resources:

Have a question? Contact our experts.

About the author
Mike learned the diamond business from the ground-up at Leo Schachter Diamonds - one of the world's top diamond manufacturers. He has been recognized as a diamond industry expert by Time, PeopleMoney, The Daily Mirror, NerdWallet, The Times Herald, Yahoo Finance Australia, The Art of Charm, The Washington Diplomat, The Next Web, and more. See more
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Blue Nile Blue Nile is the largest and most well known internet jewelry seller. They have the industry-leading largest available exclusive online inventory. Their high quality images are catching up to James Allens' and their prices are amazing.
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James Allen James Allen is the leader in online diamond sales. Their imaging technology is at the point where it's almost the same as inspecting a diamond with a jeweler's loupe. Their customer experience is best in class, and they have recently upgraded their non-engagement jewelry inventory as well.
What we love about them:
  • No questions asked returns within 30 days of shipment. James Allen will send you a paid shipping label to return the ring.
  • Lifetime Warranty
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  • Free prong tightening, repolishing, rhodium plating and cleaning every 6 months
  • Provide insurance appraisals
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